K.E.S.

We Christened my brother's precious baby last weekend. I am more than honored to be this sweet girl's godmother. She wore my grandfather's Christening gown, which is 99 years old. Most of my Mom's side of the family wore it too. Pretty special.

It's been hard for me to write about her arrival, it's so emotional for me. Of course I think she is the most beautiful baby ever, but it's more than that too. It's seeing my brother be such an amazing father and being so proud of him that I could burst, seeing my sister-in-law in a whole new light and realizing even more what a beautiful person she is, watching my Mom with this baby and being amazed at the depth of that love, missing my Dad so much and being so sad that he missed this but knowing he is looking down at us all and smiling, and of course having even more emotion (confused ones as usual) about not having my own babies.

Losing my Dad and meeting this sweet new baby have made me cry and think and love in whole new ways, and that's a lot to handle in 4 short months. I have lots of emotional sorting to do, but in the meantime, I'm seizing time with my family, resetting my priorities, thinking more about the long-term, and taking every opportunity I can to hold this baby.

LOST: The suckage

six years. 6 years. SIX years. six YEARS. YEARS!!!!!!

And what are we left with?

What about the electromagnetism? What happened to Widmore? Why was there no button back in the old days? What about that one time when the nobody pushed the button and the numbers turned over to hieroglyphics? What about those UV drawings in that one hatch? Why couldn't people have babies? What about the virus and the vaccines? What was up with that one underwater station and those people that were still in there? What about the time travel? Why did we need that? Why Tunisia? Why the wheel? Why antartica? Why a polar bear, and what about Michael and Walt anyway?? Where'd the healing pool come from, and where'd the other others come from anyway? Why the statue? Who built the statue? What lies in the shadow of the statue anyway? Who was that original lady who killed the twins' mother? Why, once John Locke is dead, does Hurley need to protect the cork? Why couldn't anybody just drink the damn water? What happened to Jack and Juliette's kid? Why were there 2 islands? What about the dharma shark? Why didn't he eat more people? Who is still bringing in the dharma food and how are they getting back and forth to the island (in the 2000's not the 70's). What about Ecko? What happened to Rose and Bernard? What was up with the ash and the cabin and pouring the ash around the cabin to keep Jacob in or whatever? Was Jacob trapped in the cabin?Or was it really the smoke monster? Why could a submarine get in and out of the island's magnetic field but a boat couldn't? What about all those costumes when they were looking for vaccines? What about Daniel's old girlfriend that went crazy and Widmore was taking care of? What about Eloise? Was she dead or not or both? Why is there the shadow of a city on the original LOST show opening screen?

EXHAUSTION. and FRUSTRATION. And JJ Abrams...MEAN!